The following is a commentary on the checklist above:
I often feel concern about my child's safety.
Parents who are frequently focused on a child's safety are usually not anxiety-disordered. More often,
they are aware of the high levels of crimes against children, and concerned about ways to protect their
kids. Excessive concern often indicates that a parent can't figure out what will make children safer.
My confidence as a parent is high, and my self esteem is strong.
Research finds that parents who have low self-esteem and a great deal of self doubt are often attractive
targets to con men, particularly those who target children for sexual abuse.
I've told my kids what I would do if they were approached by a sexual predator.
Why bring up such an unpleasant subject with children? Won't it only frighten them?
It is more likely that a frank discussion of how a parent will deal with child molesters normalizes the
experience and strengthens a child's confidence. More importantly, when a parent indicates that she will
contact law enforcement, children know they will be taken seriously and protected.
I'm satisfied with my child's grades.
Children are safer when their self confidence is high, because they are more likely to act in their own
best interest and less likely to be trapped by their neediness and need for reassurance. Good grades
in school protect kids because they raise a youngster's faith in himself.
My child has no attachments to adults that make me uncomfortable.
If there are attachments which make a parent uneasy, the best choice is for a parent to limit access to a
child by a questionable adult. No explanations or justifications are required. The person who raises the
kid gets to indulge her worries.
My child has good judgment for his age.
Sexual predators often target a youngster who can easily be confused and misled. When a child can
trust his own judgment, he is more likely to act to protect himself when the need arises.
My child knows about escape hatches and two deeps.
It's extremely difficult for children to assess the motives of adults, and criminals are skilled at disguising
their intentions. Children can notice features of their environment, such as whether they can find a way
to escape from a situation and whether there is more than one adult present with them. Noticing these
aspects of their surroundings helps kids to avoid dangerous settings.
I have talked with my child at times when he was depressed and I understand those things which
make him feel helpless and hopeless.
Children who are burdened with difficult feelings are often the target of child molesters. Adult criminals
can sense a child's neediness and take advantage of the isolation that comes from unhappy feelings.
When a parent is connected to a child's insides, it protects him from being seduced into abusive
relationships.
I have shared my views on sexual responsibility with my child according to his maturity level.
Teaching young people adult sexual values and appropriate behavior is a long term undertaking and
one that requires sensitivity to a child's intellectual level. A youngster at seven learns simple concepts
but at seventeen, a young person is able to deal with more complex issues of relating.
.
We have a crime action plan in our family.
Just like families need a fire escape plan, and a plan for when somebody gets lost on vacation, families
need a crime action plan. This makes clear to family members and anybody associated with the family
that parents can't be conned into shielding a sexual predator. When the plan includes seeking damages
for harm done to a child if abuse happens in an organizational setting, it also stimulates organizations
that deal with children to tighten their security framework.
I arrange daily situations with my child where there is at least 15 minutes of listening time.
These arrangements can involve walking the dog together, cleaning a youngster's room, doing dishes,
driving to school or other natural opportunities for contact. They afford a parent a chance to tune in to
a youngster's mood and concerns on a continuing basis. Predators look for kids who have no such
access to caring adults.
If my child reported abuse by a family member, I would not talk it over with that person to try to
straighten things out.
Taken by surprise when a child reports 'inappropriate behavior', a parent's first impulse is to clear up
any misunderstanding and smooth out difficulties in a family. But indications of criminal sexual activity
against a child are not isolated instances and indicate a criminal pattern that is likely to target many
children. Discussing the problem with the accused offers him the opportunity to con parents into
conspiring with him against a child's interests and isolates a child. It also recycles the perpetrator who
becomes more skilled at targeting children.
I know how to think like a child molester and to estimate criminal risk.
Adults on a busy street continuously estimate their criminal risk, based on their perception of the
behavior and intentions of others. This is largely because media promotes safety awareness and
frequently reports new criminal scams. Thinking like a criminal saves people from being victimized by
pickpockets and purse snatchers. The same logic can be applied to protecting children.
I am aware of seductive adults in my community.
Noticing seductive adult behavior is not the equivalent of branding someone as a criminal, but it does
raise an alert to be aware of another's behavior. When a man gives a woman a prolonged hug, she is
likely to respond with some degree of withdrawal, an automatic and subtle reaction to the perceived risk.
In the same way, when an adult wrestles with children or tickles them, it makes sense to pay attention to
child safety.
I know the children that my child spends his time with, and they are often around me.
Juvenile sexual predators are a large proportion of child molesters, and it makes sense to be aware of
social interaction among kids. This is particularly true when young children play with older ones.
I would seek prosecution of anyone who forced my child into sexual activity.
Most parents would prefer to deal with indications of sexual abuse by avoiding the adult in question and
shielding a child. Unfortunately, this leaves the perpetrator free to target other kids, based on what he
has learned from this experience. To reduce the FBI's estimates of child victimization, all adults must
seek full criminal prosecution of child molesters.
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I often feel concern about my child's safety.
Parents who are frequently focused on a child's safety are usually not anxiety-disordered. More often,
they are aware of the high levels of crimes against children, and concerned about ways to protect their
kids. Excessive concern often indicates that a parent can't figure out what will make children safer.
My confidence as a parent is high, and my self esteem is strong.
Research finds that parents who have low self-esteem and a great deal of self doubt are often attractive
targets to con men, particularly those who target children for sexual abuse.
I've told my kids what I would do if they were approached by a sexual predator.
Why bring up such an unpleasant subject with children? Won't it only frighten them?
It is more likely that a frank discussion of how a parent will deal with child molesters normalizes the
experience and strengthens a child's confidence. More importantly, when a parent indicates that she will
contact law enforcement, children know they will be taken seriously and protected.
I'm satisfied with my child's grades.
Children are safer when their self confidence is high, because they are more likely to act in their own
best interest and less likely to be trapped by their neediness and need for reassurance. Good grades
in school protect kids because they raise a youngster's faith in himself.
My child has no attachments to adults that make me uncomfortable.
If there are attachments which make a parent uneasy, the best choice is for a parent to limit access to a
child by a questionable adult. No explanations or justifications are required. The person who raises the
kid gets to indulge her worries.
My child has good judgment for his age.
Sexual predators often target a youngster who can easily be confused and misled. When a child can
trust his own judgment, he is more likely to act to protect himself when the need arises.
My child knows about escape hatches and two deeps.
It's extremely difficult for children to assess the motives of adults, and criminals are skilled at disguising
their intentions. Children can notice features of their environment, such as whether they can find a way
to escape from a situation and whether there is more than one adult present with them. Noticing these
aspects of their surroundings helps kids to avoid dangerous settings.
I have talked with my child at times when he was depressed and I understand those things which
make him feel helpless and hopeless.
Children who are burdened with difficult feelings are often the target of child molesters. Adult criminals
can sense a child's neediness and take advantage of the isolation that comes from unhappy feelings.
When a parent is connected to a child's insides, it protects him from being seduced into abusive
relationships.
I have shared my views on sexual responsibility with my child according to his maturity level.
Teaching young people adult sexual values and appropriate behavior is a long term undertaking and
one that requires sensitivity to a child's intellectual level. A youngster at seven learns simple concepts
but at seventeen, a young person is able to deal with more complex issues of relating.
.
We have a crime action plan in our family.
Just like families need a fire escape plan, and a plan for when somebody gets lost on vacation, families
need a crime action plan. This makes clear to family members and anybody associated with the family
that parents can't be conned into shielding a sexual predator. When the plan includes seeking damages
for harm done to a child if abuse happens in an organizational setting, it also stimulates organizations
that deal with children to tighten their security framework.
I arrange daily situations with my child where there is at least 15 minutes of listening time.
These arrangements can involve walking the dog together, cleaning a youngster's room, doing dishes,
driving to school or other natural opportunities for contact. They afford a parent a chance to tune in to
a youngster's mood and concerns on a continuing basis. Predators look for kids who have no such
access to caring adults.
If my child reported abuse by a family member, I would not talk it over with that person to try to
straighten things out.
Taken by surprise when a child reports 'inappropriate behavior', a parent's first impulse is to clear up
any misunderstanding and smooth out difficulties in a family. But indications of criminal sexual activity
against a child are not isolated instances and indicate a criminal pattern that is likely to target many
children. Discussing the problem with the accused offers him the opportunity to con parents into
conspiring with him against a child's interests and isolates a child. It also recycles the perpetrator who
becomes more skilled at targeting children.
I know how to think like a child molester and to estimate criminal risk.
Adults on a busy street continuously estimate their criminal risk, based on their perception of the
behavior and intentions of others. This is largely because media promotes safety awareness and
frequently reports new criminal scams. Thinking like a criminal saves people from being victimized by
pickpockets and purse snatchers. The same logic can be applied to protecting children.
I am aware of seductive adults in my community.
Noticing seductive adult behavior is not the equivalent of branding someone as a criminal, but it does
raise an alert to be aware of another's behavior. When a man gives a woman a prolonged hug, she is
likely to respond with some degree of withdrawal, an automatic and subtle reaction to the perceived risk.
In the same way, when an adult wrestles with children or tickles them, it makes sense to pay attention to
child safety.
I know the children that my child spends his time with, and they are often around me.
Juvenile sexual predators are a large proportion of child molesters, and it makes sense to be aware of
social interaction among kids. This is particularly true when young children play with older ones.
I would seek prosecution of anyone who forced my child into sexual activity.
Most parents would prefer to deal with indications of sexual abuse by avoiding the adult in question and
shielding a child. Unfortunately, this leaves the perpetrator free to target other kids, based on what he
has learned from this experience. To reduce the FBI's estimates of child victimization, all adults must
seek full criminal prosecution of child molesters.
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Take Stock
Parent
Questionnaire
Taking stock is a way for parents to make an
assessment of a child's safety, based on his soical
surroundings and behavioral patterns. There is no
perfect protection for kids, but we can reduce the
potential for sex crimes against kids by examining
the circumstances in which a child lives, and by
measuring the resources he can use to deal with
challenging circumstances.
Check those items or practices that apply to you:
and then see the comments below
Parent
Questionnaire
Taking stock is a way for parents to make an
assessment of a child's safety, based on his soical
surroundings and behavioral patterns. There is no
perfect protection for kids, but we can reduce the
potential for sex crimes against kids by examining
the circumstances in which a child lives, and by
measuring the resources he can use to deal with
challenging circumstances.
Check those items or practices that apply to you:
and then see the comments below
I Often feel concern about my child's safety.
My confidence as a parent is high and my self-esteem is strong.
I've told my kids what I would do if they were approached by a sexual predator.
I'm satisfied with my child's grades.
My child has no attachments to adults that make me uncomfortable.
My child has good judgment for his age.
My child knows about escape hatches and two deeps.
I have talked with my child at times when he was depressed and I understand those
things which make him feel helpless and hopeless.
I have shared my views on sexual responsibility with my child according to his
maturity level.
We have a crime action plan in our family.
I arrange daily situations with my child where there is at least 15 minutes of
listening time.
If my child reported abuse by a family member, I would not talk it over with that
person to try to straighten things out.
I know how to think like a child molester and to estimate criminal risk.
I am aware of seductive adults in my community.
I know the children that my child spends his time with, and they are often around
me.
I would seek prosecution of anyone who forced my child into sexual activity.
My confidence as a parent is high and my self-esteem is strong.
I've told my kids what I would do if they were approached by a sexual predator.
I'm satisfied with my child's grades.
My child has no attachments to adults that make me uncomfortable.
My child has good judgment for his age.
My child knows about escape hatches and two deeps.
I have talked with my child at times when he was depressed and I understand those
things which make him feel helpless and hopeless.
I have shared my views on sexual responsibility with my child according to his
maturity level.
We have a crime action plan in our family.
I arrange daily situations with my child where there is at least 15 minutes of
listening time.
If my child reported abuse by a family member, I would not talk it over with that
person to try to straighten things out.
I know how to think like a child molester and to estimate criminal risk.
I am aware of seductive adults in my community.
I know the children that my child spends his time with, and they are often around
me.
I would seek prosecution of anyone who forced my child into sexual activity.